I present to you “Major League: The True Story”
No this is not another sequel to the Major League movie. Instead it is the real life version.
A team with the most ridiculously ugly logo. Team colors and a team uniform that suggests some elementary kid drew it (probably David Samson himself).
Then there is the team.
Leading off and playing short stop for the Miami Marlins, none other than the flashy and potential Dance Dance Revolution guy Jose Reyes.
Batting second in center field the ever infamous Emilio Bonifacio who Mets fans totally hate.
Third and at third base is Hanley “the crybaby” Ramirez who needs a couple days off a week to work on his tan to look pretty for the ladies. He also doesn’t put in much effort on the field. He’s that high priced talent, or just high priced like Roger Dorn.
Fourth playing right field is Mike Stanton. He is a quiet guy, much like Pedro Serrano who has problems with curve balls, but can pound the daylights out of a straight fast ball.
Fifth is first basemen Gaby Sanchez. He’s a quiet guy who can really clothesline someone. Just ask Tony Plush or whatever alter ego Nyjer Morgan is using nowadays.
Sixth and playing left field is twitter addict Logan “LoMoMarlins” Morrison. There is a couple betting pools open on who gets in trouble first, LoMo for tweeting or Ozzie for tweeting or going on a rampage.”
Seventh at Catcher John Buck. He very well may be the closest thing to normal.
At second base and batting 8<sup>th</sup> is Omar Infante. It really should be “his name is …” Dan Uggla which in this case he would be much higher up. Infanto sucks and probably won’t last long there. Maybe Coghlan will run him out in the second half if Coghlan doesn’t get injured again throwing pies at people.
Notable Pitchers
Leo Nunez with the fake illegal name.
Ricky Nolasco who is another high priced talent who is just “high priced.”
And last, but certainly not least the management.
David “the loud talking midget” Samson as team President or whatever it is that he actually does.
Jeffrey Loria the weirdo art dealer.
And the biggest nutjob manager in baseball, Ozzie Guillen.
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